Unroyal
by sharingstories2
Summary: Royalty sucks. When Morgan and Merlin fall in love they must hide their Relationship but when they have been caught with the person tell or help them?
1. Chapter 1

At first they tried to deny the obvious attraction, they were polar opposites and Uther would never allow it to happen. So they decided to keep their interactions minimal. The odd glance in each others direction, a sparse conversation here and there but in the end it didn't matter, they always found another in the end.

It started innocently, building up a trust yet when he was almost killed protecting Arthur she had decided enough was enough and that's why she had called the boy into her room. He stood in front of her and they stared at each other in silence before she got up and promptly slapped him.  
" _How dare you!"_ she screeched, he gaped at her like a fish. She began her tirade, unknowing that he was currently thinking.  
"How dare you nearly die, you utter idiot and just when I was starting to trust you. How dare you betray that, how on earth am I supposed to trust you when you have a death wish. God how Arthur can be so ignorant of just how important you actually are is beyond me" She trailed off when she noticed he wasn't listening.  
"Merlin?" she asked. Merlin's eyes shone with admiration and something that could be classed as love. He walked towards her, clasping her hands.  
"Do you have any idea of just how utterly beautiful you are?" he asked, his breath blowing softly against her face. She gulped and tried to pull away. The feeling that was stirring in her stomach was stopping her from speaking and by god she was not done yelling at him.

Merlin noticed how her eyes were burning with passion, for him and for the fact that she needed him to know he was important to her. He laughed inside at the effect he had on her, her usual passionate self was being squelched at the fact that he was so close.  
"I'm not done yelling. You are such a self-sacrificing idiot-"she was cut off as merlin slammed his lips to hers. She pulled away  
"A very good kisser too" merlin laughed and kissed her neck.  
"Morgana?" he asked, she hummed in response.  
"Shut up" and the he brought her closer to him and kissed her heartily.

Morgana didn't know what the feeling was that was working its way through her body but she knew she liked it. She knew that what she was feeling she had never felt with another man.

Merlin knew that there would be consequences to his behaviour if the king found out but he didn't care. He wanted… needed morgana like he needed air. She didn't realise how much he needed her.

The moment was ruined by a knock at the door.  
"My Lady?" Gwen's voice echoed through the wooden door. The two pulled apart and Merlin grabbed his jacket which lay discarded on the floor and jumped behind the curtain. Morgana made herself look presentable.  
"Yes, you may enter" she announced. Gwen entered and looked around the room then turned to Morgana.  
"Is there anything you need before I retire?" Gwen asked and Morgana shook her head  
"No thank you and have a nice night Gwen" Gwen nodded and left just as Merlin fell over. Morgana laughed and helped him up.  
"You are so adorable" she said, he winked  
"Only for you mi 'lady" Morgana laughed at his pathetic attempt at flirting.  
"Oh so you are not adorably clumsy for our dear prince?" he shrugged, Morgana kissed him lightly on the cheek and the both erupted in bouts of laughter.  
"You know its past night time Merlin you're going to be up in a few hours, I think you better get back to Gaius." Merlin's shoulder sagged.  
"If I must" she kissed him once again on the lips but before she could say bye Merlin wrapped his hand around her waist and kissed her deeper. He pulled away when he unfortunately needed to breathe.  
"Now I can go to Gaius" he said before turning to walk away but Morgana called out.  
"Just because you momentarily distracted me do not for one second think that you are out of trouble for almost dying!" Merlin laughed before walking away. Trying to keep the black haired beauty out of his thoughts, otherwise the idiotic grin would spread across his face and everyone would know that something had gone on and that couldn't happen. Not yet.


	2. Chapter 2

Merlin and Morgana spent the next few days playing cat and  
mouse. Morgana would pull him into closets or abandoned rooms and kiss and talk  
with him. He didn't mind but it was awfully distracting when he was doing his  
job. Morgana on the other hand found it extremely entertaining. The fact that her  
mere presence made him even clumsier than usual.

Merlin was starting to curse his –kind-of-girlfriend- under his breath. Did she want  
them to get caught? It's okay to freak him out in andoned corridors but in  
front of Arthur it was not. She had  
walked in and began to talk to Arthur but kept glancing at Merlin and smirking.  
Merlin zoned out and focused on his chores till he heard.

"Can I borrow Merlin for a while?" his head shot up and Arthur looked at his surrogate sister in interest.  
"Why?" he asked. Morgana pondered him for a minute before answering.  
"You see I foolishly gave Gwen the day off, she deserved it but I have made my room messy and I need Merlin to clean it" She said, glancing at Merlin. Arthur shook his head.  
"Why not get the other servants to do it?"  
"You expect me to let someone I do not trust around my room?" Arthur looked towards the younger boy.  
"Have you done all your chores?" he asked, Merlin nodded.  
"Very well, you have two hours before I want you back here Merlin, is that clear?" Merlin nodded and left with Morgana.

Merlin knew that Morgana had used an excuse to get him in her bedroom but he didn't really care. Upon arriving Morgana fell back onto her bed and patted the space next to her.  
"You called for me?" Merlin said, sitting next to her.  
"I wanted to talk to you" she replied and Merlin's eyes shot up  
"About?" she turned to him, her eyes sparkling. His heart sped up slightly as she grabbed his hand.  
"Anything really, we have kissed and hugged but never really talked, tell me about yourself Merlin" and so he did. He told her about his life in Ealdor, the mischief he used to get up to and how he never knew his father. He told her about Guias and how he never hoped to be a physician and how he felt inadequate to be Arthur's servant. He told her about how much he respected yet despised the prince and she in return told him all about her life, how she never knew her mother and barely knew her father, why she didn't mind magic and at what point she realised that she would never be as cruel as Uther.

They had spent so much time talking that they hadn't realised Merlin was late. Very late. They only realised when Arthur banged on the door, demanding for his manservant to come out. Merlin grimaced and did as Arthur asked. He dragged Arthur out and Morgana laughed  
at the look of panic on Merlins face before he was dragged away.

She lay back on her bed on sighed. Merlin had told her a lot but she knew he was hiding something but she supposed that when he was ready she would be told, despite his secret she found him endearing. If it was some lord she had fallen for she probably would be disgusted with herself but merlin was different. He told her the truth and always followed his heart, yet she was afraid, if Uther found out it would be merlin that got in trouble, not her. With that troubling thought she lay back down. She would not let Merlin get hurt because she loved him.


	3. Chapter 3

The next few weeks Merlin and Morgan spent every spare moment together, trying to get a gauge on how their relationship worked and so far only one person had become suspicious, Gwen. She didn't want to say anything because her friends were happy and Morgana's nightmares had all but gone, little did she know that was merlin's doing. When Merlin had used magic to summon the great dragon Morgana had seen him, later confronting him. She had welcome his magic, it made him no different in her book. He in turn recognised her magic and helped her control it, together they helped each other. She looked back on it fondly in all honesty.

 _Morgana wasn't one to stay back and wait for answers, she went looking for them, damn the consequences. So since Merlin had been acting slightly or more weird that usual, she followed him. What she found was totally different than expected, she had a slight suspicion he was cheating or plotting something nefarious. Neither rang true. What she had found was him calling out in a strange language. Dragonise. She had half a mind to walk over and freak him out but she hid behind the bush when she heard her name.  
"I think she has magic, what do I do? I feel like she has the right to know" she almost awed at the utter look of defeat on his face.  
"The young witch has two destinies young warlock, learning how to love and learning how to hate" not much was said after that as Merlin sent the dragon away and Morgana ran back to the castle._

 _The next day Morgana summoned merlin to her room. When he entered he sat down and looked at her. Morgana didn't know what to say so blurted out what was on her mind._

 _"You're a warlock!" she didn't stop for merlin's admission, deciding to carry on talking.  
"You're a warlock, I saw you summon the great dragon, I'm a witch and if Uther finds out we will be executed, I do not want to die Merlin and I cannot bear the thought of you being burnt on the pyre. Oh what are we going to do, It is not like I can control it Merlin" Merlin who had gotten sick of her pacing and pulled her down to sit on his lap, kissing her head.  
"Yes what you say is true Morgana but I promise I will help you control who you are and so long as we never use the magic in front of the king or anyone else there is no reason to say we will be executed. Nothing bad is going to happen" he said. Morgana smiled at him and kissed his cheek.  
"How did I get so lucky to have you love me?" she asked, a smile working its way onto her face. He grinned back and kissed her gently on the lips.  
"I think that it I who should be asking you that."_

Gwen was still suspicious of the two of them and when she entered one morning to find Merlin lying at the foot of Morgana's bed she almost screamed. Instead she snook back out the room and knocked on the door.  
"Lady Morgana?" she asked. The pair jumped up and Merlin hid behind a wall. Gwen walked in and smirked.  
"So Lady Morgana is there anything you need?" she asked, walking towards Merlin who held his breath.  
"No Gwen, I'm okay for now" Morgana said, desperation creeping into her voice. Gwen smiled and turned to face Morgana.  
"Of course not, I suppose Merlin is taking very good care of you" she said and watched as Morgana's face fell.  
"I have no idea what you are on about" she exclaimed. Gwen said nothing but walked towards her friend and pulled him out into the open.  
"No idea at all?" she asked, eyebrow raised. Morgana looked towards Merlin, panicked. Merlin turned to his friend.  
"Pease Gwen, I love Morgana you can't tell anyone" he pleaded and Morgana's face brightened, He had never said it out loud. Gwen looked between her friends and smiled.  
"Your secret is safe with me but please know that there will be consequences if anyone finds out" they nodded and Gwen left. Morgana turned to Merlin.  
"You love me?" she asked, her voice shaking. Merlin looked at his feet, nodding. Morgana took his hand.  
"I love you too, I know it's crazy. We have only been together for a small amount of time but I do love you Merlin" she confessed. Merlin looked her in the eyes, looking for any amount of a lie but found none. He smiled and wiped away a lone tear that fell down her porcelain face. The room seemed to spin slightly as Merlin blurted out  
"You are so important to me" and then he kissed her, timidly. She kissed him back, poring her emotions into the kiss, he smiled. Morgana pulled away grinning like a mad women.  
"I am so glad that I found you Merlin" he nodded and kissed her forehead.

Since it was merlin's only day off in a month he spent it in Morgana's room, talking and laughing with her and Gwen who still had to preform her duties. How nobody found him there was a mystery but it didn't really matter. Unfortunately Merlin still had to go back to his guardian at the end of the day but he left Morgana with a single rose and a kiss. Gwen look at the both of them and smiled. They clearly loved each other despite the short space of time, she just hoped it would last.


	4. Chapter 4

Gwen watched as her friends relationship flourished, as their love blossomed and how they somehow managed to remain hidden. She listened as Morgana told her about the wonderful flowers Merlin had gotten her, or about how Merlin made her feel. Alas despite how much they wanted to their time together was becoming sparse. It was minter time in Camelot and Merlin's time was taken up by Arthur and Guias, the only indication he even wanted to spend time with her was the single rose and apology he left outside her door. Nether the less the couple barely saw each other, it had gotten to the point where Morgana was crying on Gwen's shoulder because she missed him. Fortunately Gwen had a plan, a risky one but a plan nether the less and that is why she was stood outside Arthur's door. Arthur let her come in and she did.  
"Hello Gwen" he said, trying to ignore his attract action for the serving girl.  
"My lord" she bowed. Arthur grimaced, he hated formalities.  
"My lord" she began "May I ask of a favour?" Arthur looked at her in interest  
"What favour?" Gwen breathed in deeply, scared of asking.  
"You see I need to run some errands for lady Morgana and I was wondering if… if at all possible, could please borrow Merlin my lord. Some of the errands are sensitive to Lady Morgana and I will not be able to complete them all by myself and Merlin is, besides me the servant she trusts the most. I need his help my prince" Arthur looked at Gwen in interest. He should feel jealous that she wanted Merlin's help but he saw the way his servant looked at his surrogate sister, he wouldn't try anything.  
"On one condition, that he has finished his duties" Gwen bowed.  
"Of course sire."

Merlin followed Gwen out of the castle and into the forest, when they reached a clearing. Merlin looked up to find Morgana standing there.  
"Morgana…" he breathed. The woman in question launched herself in to his arms.  
"Oh Merlin how I have missed you!" Gwen smiled at them both.  
"I'll leave you two be, you have at most two hours before Arthur notices you are not with me" she told them before leaving.

Merlin kissed Morgana passionately, his face full of love.  
"I am so, so sorry that I haven't been there you. If I could I would, I really would. I have missed you so much!" Morgana laughed.  
"I know my darling, the fact that you still leave me a rose, which is both beautiful and romantic, proves that you do." She grabbed his collar and pulled him down, kissing him again. He kissed her back just as passionately, until breathing became a necessity not an option.

Merlin waved his hand and manipulated the nearby tree into a chair, so both he and Morgan could sit. Morgana rested her head on his shoulder.  
"So what has my brother had you do?"

"Oh you know the usual, clean cook and save his life" Morgana laughed.  
"How he can't see how important you are is beyond me" she told him, caressing his face tenderly.  
"It's because he doesn't know about well you know" he said, gesturing to himself. Morgana frowned at him.  
"He will one day, when… when Uther is no longer king" Merlin stared at her, scared of the hate and uncertainty in that sentence.  
"Morgana Uther despite his many failing is a good king, he may be ruthless but he cares deeply for Camelot" Morgana looked down. She knew he was right, he usually was but she so desperately wanted to blame her surrogate father, she knew she shouldn't hate him but he made her hate herself and she didn't know how to forgive him for that. Merlin clasped Morgana's hand in his own.  
"Morgana, darling despite what he has done he has tried to do his best by you. You cannot deny him that truth" she nodded slowly. Merlin pulled her in to a hug  
"We will be free one day." They spent the next few hours wrapped up in each others embrace, whispering sweet nothings into each others ear.


	5. Chapter 5

Merlin should have known that his peace could never last for long, he should have known that something terrible would have happened. He just never imagined that it would be her. Morgause. Admittedly she didn't seem too harsh, she seemed to want the same things as himself and Morgana, for magic to be free. He just never imagined how far she was willing to go, nor how far Morgana had become infatuated. On more than one occasion it had caused arguments and fights, even Gwen was worried about the two of them. Then it had magically stopped, Merlin thought it was due to him finally getting through to her. He never imagined it was because she was lying.

When he did find out it was too late, Morgause had captured him in magical chains and Morgana had left him to rot. When he had been rescued by the dragon the wise dragon told him something that shook his very core.  
"It is your destiny to help Arthur reunite magic. I fear that to do so you may have to turn on the witch, can you do it?" Merlin knew the answer. He would, he would always save Arthur because he HAD to, and he also knew that harming Morgana would kill him. Each other way he ends up dying inside so with that in mind he sought out Gwen. His faithful friend knew all about his magic after she caught him trying to heal Morgana's nightmare, the girl had initially been scared but after a couple of weeks she came around.

He sought her out and told her to meet in in a secluded area, when she got there she sat next to him.  
"I have to leave" Merlin said abruptly, Gwen looked at him shocked.  
"Why?" she asked. Merlin took a deep breath, trying to steady himself.  
"My destiny is to protect Arthur and I will choose that above all else, he may be a gigantic Pratt but his is my friend. I am scared that in doing so I may have to harm Morgana, she's on a path of darkness Gwen and… I'm afraid she may not be saved." Gwen gasped as Merlin began to cry, she had never seen her friend so torn up.  
"I love her Gwen… I love her so much that it hurts but I cannot deny my destiny, trust me I have tried but I cannot" Gwen pulled him into hug, whispering encouraging words.  
"Where will you go?" she asked. Merlin shrugged  
"I will go back to Ealdor for a while, perhaps help my mother and then I shall travel. I just know that I cannot stay here" she nodded.  
"I shall help you pack" she said numbly. When she turned to leave Merlin cried, he wished that he was doing the right thing, yet he didn't know what that was anymore.

Before Merlin left he hugged Gaius goodbye, muttering an apology. Gaius just told him to stay safe before looking away, trying not to cry. Merlin then turned to Gwen  
"You will take care of her?" he asked, his voice unsteady, Morgana's servant nodded.  
"You just worry about yourself, I'll look after her and keep Arthur from storming Ealdor when his new servant is awful" Merlin laughed, he had told the prince that he was leaving to go to his mother, as she was terminally ill. Arthur had nodded mutely and promised that there would be plenty of armour to polish when he returned.

Merlin was nearly out of Camelot when Morgana tried to find him, she was too late when she realised his was true on his intent. Merlin was gone and so was a piece of her heart. That night when she got to her chambers she re-read his letter.

 _Dear Morgana,_

 _I am terribly sorry but I cannot stay in Camelot any longer. I love you Morgana, I always have and I always will but I refuse to watch as you turn dark. I have tried to save you, I have tried to help but nothing I do will change the path you are set upon. I will admit that I am being selfish but I cannot watch whilst the woman I love turns into the woman who she should never be._

 _I will never forget you, you will forever be in my heart._

 _Yours forever and always,_

 _Merlin._


	6. Chapter 6

It took two days, that's right only twenty-four hours before Gwen found Morgana crying in her chambers.  
"Morgana?" she asked. Gwen shut the door as Morgana began sniffling  
"Tell me, was it really me that drove him away?" Gwen sat next to the lady and handed her a handkerchief  
"Yes and no… Merlin left partly due to your deeds to Morgause but partly because… he's selfish, he couldn't watch you self-destruct my lady" Gwen admitted. Morgana wiped her nose and looked to Gwen  
"Do you approve of what I'm doing?" she asked, shyly. Gwen shook her head  
"I approve of your reasons Morgana but the way you are doing it… with all due respect it makes you no different to king Uther" Morgana looked up at Gwen.  
"How dare you! I am better than Uther! He lied to me, belittled me and made me feel inadequate" she raged. Gwen studied her carefully  
"You mean like you did with Merlin, the man you claim to love" Morgana stilted, turning to look at her maid.  
"Gwen… if you were me and you had to choose between the man you love and the crown, your rightful birth right who would you choose?" Gwen didn't miss a beat.  
"I'd choose the man I love, what's the point in a crown if you're not happy my lady?" at that Gwen set to her tasks, letting Morgana think overhear decisions before retiring for the night.

The next morning Morgana was missing, the bells were rung and the guards were sent to look for her but they didn't have to look far as at midday herself and merlin walked into the village. The guards swarmed them, scanning Morgana for any signs of injury and knocking Merlin to the side. It was at that moment that Arthur found them.  
"Merlin?" he asked, surprised. He helped Merlin up before going over to the guards  
"Release her" he said. The guard turned to him  
"But sire we are under strict orders to bring her to the king" the night protested. Arthur shook his head  
"Why do you think I am here?" the guard looked stumped for a moment before releasing Morgana into Arthurs care. Arthur took Morgana and looked her over  
"Yeah, I'm okay" she said quietly.  
"I… I uh just wanted to say bye to Merlin" she admitted quietly.  
"I brought her back, I know this is not the time but my mother has recovered so please may I request my job back." Arthur laughed  
"You do pick your moments merlin, of course you can have your job back but because you made Morgana run away maybe you should polish my armour… before and after training" he quipped. Morgana looked mortified but Merlin laughed  
"I do not know if I can do that sire, you may not even make it to training at the rate you are going" Merlin replied cheekily. Morgana snickered but Arthur looked frustrated  
"Oh are you calling me fat Merlin?"  
"No, not fat sire just… I may need to add extra holes to your belt" and then Merlin ducked as Arthur tried to hit him.  
"Go clean my room or something and as for you Morgana, father requests your presence" and then the lady was dragged off to the worst scolding of her life.


	7. Dear readers

Dear readers.

This is to address something that quite a few people have noticed, whether you have only read this story or others you may have noticed that a lot of my stories carry dark themes such as

· Suicide

· Mental illness

· Rape

· Abuse (of any kind)

· Self-harm

So I feel the need to stress this and I need your help. If you have read any of my stories and they have triggers, even if the trigger seems really remote could you please leave a review or private message, as much as the stories I write are for the reader's enjoyment sometimes they can be very triggering. Thank you.

That is not the reason I have written this note. I am here today to tell everyone that they are worth it, even if you don't believe it, I do. You are all stronger than what ails you and what ails you can be defeated, I believe that everyone has an inner battle inside them but you can survive. If you are experiencing anything, whether it be mental illness or you have been through a traumatic experience, hell even if you just feel sad or upset it is okay to get help. It is okay. I understand this is scary and it could mean that you will have to experience changes that you are not ready for but it will all be worth it. You can get there.

I want to wish everyone reading this all the happiness in the world, you deserve it. Remember you all have beautiful souls and its okay to feel sad and alone or whatever you are feeling. I want you to know that even if you feel like no one believes in you, I do.

Thank you all, I hope you all find happiness and joy in your lives.

\- Sharingstories2


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